(no subject)
Dec. 12th, 2009 | 05:45 pm
posted by: ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif)
simidaiji
i just had the weirdest dream about my mum, and i woke up crying. and dont know this wk or last, i woke up crying consecutively for 2 days, first night dreamt of dad, and second was korkor. all to do with quarreling/unhappy things. damn weird. even after i woke up and realised it was a dream, i couldnt stop crying.
i remember when i was super young. during school holidays, on a sunday night, after watching wo he jiang shi you ge yue hui tgt with my mum, i slept in my parents' room. i was just stoning and suddenly started visualizing myself getting old..and eventually dying, and lying in a coffin. so i got quite frightened i started crying! hahahah. so i learnt that it was not good to think about that, cos it makes me cry. and i havent been, until recently i had one of those nights again. was quite scary, knowing that life can become quite meaningless. yet i'm so afraid of dying. and i found the scariest part to be not knowing that i'm actually gonna die, it'd probably feel like going into a sleep, unless i suffer from an attack or something. and i also can't quite imagine what i'd have to go through if my loved ones pass away before me. it just gets fucking scary when i think of all these..seemingly unnecessary questions. but life nowadays isn't much of what i'd expected it to be